3. BlogPreferably in your pocket, too, on a sleek n sexy i-phone. Don't forget the actual books, as well. You'll need some material to promote. Don't worry about the content or quality. The important thing is promoting the living daylights out of them on your latest impossible-to-live-without gadget. That's the main thing. Bugging people. Getting in their face. Book signings are for sentimental old fools. The way forward is a virus of your e-books infecting every digital device on the globe, with you getting 77p for each one in return. Your e-books will be about the importance of having Facebook, Twitter, and *deep sigh* Turdpress in your quest for worldwide recognition and super-celeb-stardom. If you're a writer, get on it. If you're a reader, shoo along. You're either a writer or a reader in this world. You're either a seller or a buyer. You're either full of love or full of hate. You're either rich or you're poor. You either like marmite or you don't. You're either somebody, or you're nobody. Even Denzil Washington said that in Training Day (2001), so it must be true.
He said it. I believe it. That settles it.