A man from Ramsbottom who took a box of fireworks onto a plane said he didn’t know what the big deal was. To add insult, he had bangers, sparklers and boxes of matchsticks stuffed into his bulging Firetrap-branded jacket pockets.
He is reported to have said, “Hazardous materials my arse. This is just like the time Phillip Cook the bus driver wouldn’t let me get on the bus because I was carrying a car battery. How else was I supposed to get it home?”
Fireworks, which are gunpowder packed into tubes with a fuse, can cause ‘mayhem’ if ignited in tight confines.
The man was travelling from Basildon to Weston-super-Mare to visit a Star Trek convention where he intended to ‘put a show on’ in the car park.
He said it was too boring to wait at the carousel for suitcases so he decided to include the potentially lethal arsenal in his carry-on luggage.
A spokesman for the airline called him a, “Complete and utter pillock with hair gel for brains.”
The man responded to that by saying he had never known a firework to go off on its own before, without someone lighting it.
No charges are forthcoming.
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