"Yes Chef Sir Alan" from Newsjack in BOOK 12
GORDON RAMSEY: Welcome to Kitchen Nightmares everybody, I’m Gordon Ramsey, and with me I have the man everyone loves to hate, star of The Apprentice, Alan Sugar.
SIR ALAN SUGAR: Excuse me, but it’s Sir Alan to you.
GORDAN RAMSEY: Oh my God, this is a nightmare already. Pardon?
SIR ALAN SUGAR: My name. There’s a sir before it.
GORDAN RAMSEY: Come on, for *BLEEP* sake, what’s so uncomfortable about Al?
SIR ALAN SUGAR: I think the idea of you calling me Al is a complete bloody shambles. No. It’s Sir Alan, thank you very much.
GORDON RAMSEY: I thought it was just the wannabes on your show you made call you that.
SIR ALAN SUGAR: No, it applies to everybody, especially lightweights like you. Do you think I got to where I am today by letting people call me Al? Listen, I run a successful business because I’m minted, and I didn’t get minted by granting morons like you liberty to call me whatever the bloody hell they bloody well want. Got it?
GORDAN RAMSEY: Well, let’s get another thing straight, you old bearded pig: Whenever you address me, you address me as chef. Yes?
SIR ALAN SUGAR: You what? All that Yes Chef nonsense? From what I understand, Chef isn’t a title worth squat. I’m about as impressed by the title chef as I am about those bleedin’ Michelin stars you’re always banging on about.
GORDAN RAMSEY: This isn’t a job, it’s a passion, and my restaurants are the best in the world. Yes?
SIR ALAN SUGAR: You’re bound to tell me that, aren’t you, but I have it on good ground that your restaurants are a bloody disaster. People aren’t stupid, they know a kiddy-sized portion of your pan-fried bollocks shouldn’t cost twenny bleedin’ quid.
GORDAN RAMSEY: You amount to nothing as a man, do you know that? Take away the Amstrads and the Rolls Royce and what are we left with, eh? A tall Bill Oddie. You’re not powerful, you’re pathetic.
NOEL EDMONDS: Okay. What we have here are two titans of reality television, locked at the horns in a tense dual. But who will be the first to break? How long will Gordon hold out from addressing Sir Alan as the rest of the nation do? If and when will Sir Alan agree to answer Gordon with Yes Chef? Tune in next week to find out!
GORDON RAMSEY: Welcome to Kitchen Nightmares everybody, I’m Gordon Ramsey, and with me I have the man everyone loves to hate, star of The Apprentice, Alan Sugar.
SIR ALAN SUGAR: Excuse me, but it’s Sir Alan to you.
GORDAN RAMSEY: Oh my God, this is a nightmare already. Pardon?
SIR ALAN SUGAR: My name. There’s a sir before it.
GORDAN RAMSEY: Come on, for *BLEEP* sake, what’s so uncomfortable about Al?
SIR ALAN SUGAR: I think the idea of you calling me Al is a complete bloody shambles. No. It’s Sir Alan, thank you very much.
GORDON RAMSEY: I thought it was just the wannabes on your show you made call you that.
SIR ALAN SUGAR: No, it applies to everybody, especially lightweights like you. Do you think I got to where I am today by letting people call me Al? Listen, I run a successful business because I’m minted, and I didn’t get minted by granting morons like you liberty to call me whatever the bloody hell they bloody well want. Got it?
GORDAN RAMSEY: Well, let’s get another thing straight, you old bearded pig: Whenever you address me, you address me as chef. Yes?
SIR ALAN SUGAR: You what? All that Yes Chef nonsense? From what I understand, Chef isn’t a title worth squat. I’m about as impressed by the title chef as I am about those bleedin’ Michelin stars you’re always banging on about.
GORDAN RAMSEY: This isn’t a job, it’s a passion, and my restaurants are the best in the world. Yes?
SIR ALAN SUGAR: You’re bound to tell me that, aren’t you, but I have it on good ground that your restaurants are a bloody disaster. People aren’t stupid, they know a kiddy-sized portion of your pan-fried bollocks shouldn’t cost twenny bleedin’ quid.
GORDAN RAMSEY: You amount to nothing as a man, do you know that? Take away the Amstrads and the Rolls Royce and what are we left with, eh? A tall Bill Oddie. You’re not powerful, you’re pathetic.
NOEL EDMONDS: Okay. What we have here are two titans of reality television, locked at the horns in a tense dual. But who will be the first to break? How long will Gordon hold out from addressing Sir Alan as the rest of the nation do? If and when will Sir Alan agree to answer Gordon with Yes Chef? Tune in next week to find out!
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