Beautiful...

Well. I’ve given the almost daily blogging route a chance and quite frankly I am running out of things to say. My life is not exciting enough, I’m a boring human being. I don’t do adventure or thrill-seeking. What I do have, in abundance however, are large dollops of mysticism. I once stared out of my flat window for four hours straight with a floppy nonplussed bewildered expression on my face, hallucinating God and the Devil brokering a deal on top of the local parish church. My enemies call my hallucinations “puzzles”. It freaks their brain tech out all to death. I don’t understand them myself. I hardly get them anymore. The best one ever was when I went to a distant green planet I perceived as Heaven. I talked about that the other month. It was fan-f**king-tastic.

I saw The Incredible Hulk just the other week, but he’s hostile, not an ally. Beautiful to watch nonetheless. It’s frightening, psychosis, what it means, what it makes possible. I also saw King Kong, I’m hoping he’s friendly but I can’t be sure. Did you see the bit when he tapped his chest and Naomi Watts said “Beautiful…” in the movie? They were overlooking the sunset together and it really was beautiful. It made me realise that it is what is inside that counts. Big bad ugly Kong sat there being all beautiful and that. If he can pull it off then so can I. That’s what it made me think, that bit. That’s why Kong will always have a special place in my heart. I didn’t think much of the Skull Island remake when they made the monkey more humanoid though. There was no Naomi, for one. What, a humongous black ape and no coy blushing blonde? No matter what level you’re talking about, that just doesn’t work for me.

I had another curry last night and just like the last one I upchucked it everywhere as soon as it was over, so I shan’t be frequenting that establishment ever again. £22 for a meal with a pint is a bit extortionate though, so I won’t be out of pocket for one thing. I’ll just continue to do my food shopping in the supermarket. I’m eating quite a lot of cheesy beanz on toast if you’re wondering about my diet. You shouldn’t be, as I’m not wondering about yours. Well I am a bit, but not overly so. And now I’m waffling about each other’s diets.

One day I’ll post something important that will change the world, like a whistleblower’s soliloquy ringing out into all eternity from a sewer on an asteroid or something. It would be nice, wouldn’t it, to write something important. In my opinion, I just have. I’m about to proofread it in the local boozer after this blog post. It’s the manuscript for my latest novella, called Headswap. It’s my most recent fiction offering and I’m quite secretly proud of it. I’m looking forward to reading it with a few scoops of jar. It says a lot in a short amount of space and it’s nice and tightly plotted. So have that, Mr Universe, from me to yours truly.