(Written 21 March 2013) As for
Nasser El Sonbatty, well just recently Schmoe coined a phrase comparing
bodybuilders and Christians. As Christians ask what would Jesus do whenever
they are in a dilemma, so bodybuilders get into trouble, they can ask
themselves, “What would Nasser El Sonbatty do?”
For
example, you are considering doing the splits and shaking your ass a lot after
some funky robotic movements in sparkly yellow posing trunks during your
evening show routine to Troublemaker by Ollie Murs. It’s either that or some
manly classical poses to Conquest of Paradise by Vangelis. You can’t make your
mind up. Okay. So step back and ask yourself—what would Nasser El Sonbatty do? The answer
should be straightforward.
Quite
literally at some shows it’s one embarrassing thing after another. Many would
argue that a fully grown buff geezer stood up on stage on the verge of throwing
shapes in nowt but a g-string and tanning oil can be nothing else but. If you
want a good laugh it comes highly recommended, especially for you ladies. We
are forever perplexed by these new routines and movements, constantly exhorting,
wow, I could never imagine Nasser El
Sonbatty doing that.
Nasser
was the standard of sense. There was never any mucking about with Nasser. He
was a man’s man. When he took the steps onto that platform with the smoke
billowing from behind him you made sure you were concentrating. The thrills and
spills were over, no more pop songs, the disco dancing was done, because
here was Nasser.
His
Yugoslavian accent, big glasses and tight spandex training outfits might have
brought him an element of ridicule if the guy wasn’t built like a battering
ram. Gawd, he was huge was Nasser. Always one of the biggest cats on stage if
not the biggest outright, in an era when monstrosities like Paul Dillet were
flexing absurd amounts of quivering vein-streaked mass about. Thick, dense,
blocky, and wide as a French door patio.
So just
who was Nasser El Sonbatty, when he was here? The guy with the second best
shoulders ever, that’s what.
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