Francesca, 30

i hear voices too. have done since my teens. they counted my calories for me. i had weight gain issues. i would rely on one single product on the market to keep the fat off. it gave me the runs. i spent more time on the toilet than I did in class. the voices could see what i was doing. they told me to collect stool samples to show my doctor, to label them with dates in purple pen. i almost did. they told me to do a lot of things, including telling my younger sister she was adopted, giving up my room at the ratty, a hostel for the homeless, and never to shave my legs again. these are the little things they told me. they also commanded bigger events, such as cutting, making accusations, verbal assaults, vandalism……

sometimes i obeyed, other times i didnot. i wrote letters to my mp, said the voices were real, they were trying to get rid of me, i was on a wipeout-exterminate/kill slate, life was cheap here like in mexico, there were no rules or moral honcho at the top, only low guys roving round being heartless, i couldn’t think on my feet. mp refers me to clinician, clinician is a former bully from school who wastes no time restarting to bully me in a professional capacity, lying about my pill diary, turning me away from appointments booking too many appointments etc one day i hear painful shouting on her work phone, who is that suffering i think, does she know her or has she done it

eventually i slice up one wrist, use weak hand for effect to slash down, bleed out in kitchen, voices throw a party, i even hear balloons being blown up and music, neighbours always spying won’t let me die in peace, call corrupt coppers who bust door down, find me lying down unable to cry, think what the hell…….the wards i belonged to had werewolf full of screaming there in observation cage. i ask staff what is wolf for they said don’t worry. i think there are actors and directors putting props around me like on hollywood set. i mean, it looks like real yappie wolf. it talks like joe pasquale who says hurry up move yer feet whenever I consider sitting down.

iurse puts something in my throat during sleep, egg maybe, hatches next day in my stomach, parasitic arachnid, makes me vomit and panic, can feel bristles on legs but get over it, i grew up on a farm, my baddies may or may not know this, label this one in your stool sample collection if or when it comes out the other end. had other bloodsuckers over the years, won’t go into all details here, some came out other times some didnot, older braver now chow down whatever i want, drink smoothies and frappes and mochas, let them dribble down my chin feel enjoy pleasant sensations, voices tell me to stop try to ignore.

i believe be a positive person live well look after yourself maintain healthy aura and vibration depend on no one be independent and be OK